November 26th, 2010 by Wordsman
They sat out on the highway ledge
And watched the fair sun rise
Eventu’lly they had to stop
It really hurt their eyes
“What should we do?” Tifa asked
When no pursuit appeared
It seemed Shinra’d run out of guys
Which felt a little weird
“I say we chase Sephiroth”
A voice declared aloud
Some were just a little shocked
To hear it come from Cloud
“But he killed old man Shinra”
Barret said. “Ain’t he our friend?”
Cloud said, “If you think like that
Our doom will soon impend”
“Cloud is right,” said Tifa
“Sephiroth is no one’s bud
He likes to plan calamities
That rival Noah’s Flood”
Aeris said, “I’ll go with Cloud
He is my bodyguard”
“I’ll tag along for now,” said Red
“As far as my own yard”
“Ah, what the hell,” said Barret
“I signed up to save the world
Mako? Shinra? Sephiroth?
In my mind they’re all swirled”
They took one last look at Midgar
What did leaving portend?
Then set off on their noble quest
“Uhh . . . how do we descend?”
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November 19th, 2010 by Wordsman
Barret’s hands flew round the wheel
He steered just like a fiend
Dodging Cloud’s mad hail of blows
As he ‘cross street careened
His riders were no better off
Some near at mouth did foam
Tifa regretted her great plan
Red wished he was back home
Finally, there came an end
To their crazed escape route
They fell prey not to the guards
But to a sign: “BRIDGE OUT”
‘Fore they could know how to proceed
A foe surged from behind
Shinra had one final way
To keep its pets confined
Now they faced the Motor Ball
A giant robot tank
Equipped with twin flamethrowers
Programmed their butts to spank
But they had had enough of this
They would not be held down
No damn robot was stopping them
They were ditching this town
Blade Beam, Sled Fang, Somersault
A Grenade Bomb or two
Aeris tossed on Healing Winds
To have something to do
The robot blew, the road was rent
With a resounding CRACK
Cloud, who’d learned his lesson well
Took four or five steps back
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November 12th, 2010 by Wordsman
Outside, a Shinra man on break
Was feeling none too swift
Somehow he’d once again got stuck
With the late-late-night shift
He glumly sipped his coffee
Not sure that he could go on
They say the darkest hour
Is the one just before dawn
What he needed was excitement
For he was so very bored
Too bad he didn’t see the bike
As o’er his head it soared
As soon as his bike hit the deck
It to the left did veer
Cloud thought, “If I want to live
I need to learn to steer”
There’s nothing in the world that turns
Exactly like a bike’ll
This was, of course, Cloud’s first time e’er
Riding a motorcycle
In pursuit were Shinra goons
The bikes came two by two
With one hand, Cloud drew his sword
“Now this thing I can do”
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November 5th, 2010 by Wordsman
Barret cried, “Today’s the day
I go in glory’s blaze!”
Red said, “Leaving the two of us
Imprisoned all our days”
“Okay, I admit it
I ain’t gave this plan much thought
But those are our two options
Outside (die) or inside (rot)”
From above a voice rang out
“And how ‘bout Option C?”
“God? Is that you?” “No. Tifa
Come on. It’s time to flee
“Escape route’s up the stairs, my friends
They’d not think of this trick
The only thing I need to know
Is if you can drive stick”
Tifa stood by an old truck
From well before the war
Its engine bad, its steering worse
And . . . “Uh, this just seats four”
Then they heard a manly roar
And Aeris squealed with joy
Cloud, mounted on motorbike
Looked proud of his new toy
Barret moaned, “I’ll drive this thing”
As he stepped on the gas
“But I don’t see why he’s the one
Who gets to look badass”
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October 29th, 2010 by Wordsman
The follow-up was fast dispatched
Suff’ring from a Mindblow
Barret said, “Now we’re home free
Hey . . . where did Tifa go?”
“She stayed back to wait for Cloud”
Aeris promptly explained
Barret said, “The hell she did!”
And curses poured and rained
Tifa was one floor below
Where Rufus and Cloud were
She thought she’d have to fend off guards
But no one bothered her
Soon her friend limped down the steps
With bullet wounds and fleas
Cloud complained, “You could’ve helped!”
“Oh, sorry. Allergies”
Said Cloud, “We’ll take the stairs, I guess
Back to where we began”
Said Tifa, “Nah. Don’t wanna walk
I’ve got a better plan”
The much-beleaguered other group
Fin’lly reached the first floor
And found a whole damn army
Right outside the glass front door
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October 22nd, 2010 by Wordsman
The greater part of AVALANCHE
Was rushing to get free
Of course they skipped the long, long stairs
They’re much slower, you see
The three did not anticipate
The troubles of the ride
In fact, just one shaft over
Was the Shinra’s joy and pride
The fabled Hundred Gunner
Quickly caught up with their car
They’d no choice but to fight it
For the fall was fairly far
Barret raised his trusty gun
“You all should jus’ stay back”
Red, wanting to prove his worth
Used his Sled Fang attack
“Not bad for a cat, I guess
You sure know how to run
But sit back in your chair
And let me show you how it’s done!”
Aeris did as Barret said
‘Twas prob’ly best that way
Wild midair combat
Really wasn’t her forte
The Gunner felled, they all sat back
But their reprieve was brief
One more robot followed it
Whined Aeris, “Oh good grief!”
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October 15th, 2010 by Wordsman
At Rufus’ side, a black feline
“You’re fighting with your cat?”
The cat, Dark Nation, cast a shield
“What do you think of that?”
“First, it’s totally unfair
‘Cuz shields are really lame
Secondly, is ‘Dark Nation’
Something you’d a cat name?”
Now Rufus, he was a crack shot
Dark Nation slashed and roared
But neither one could stand up
To the mighty Buster Sword
The shield did break. Cloud raised his blade
“The Shinra line ends here!”
But then the chopper swooped down low
And he cowered in fear
Rufus hopped back on his ride
“My reign ends not today
Nor will I allow you to
All my great plans delay”
Cloud declared, “We’ll get you yet!
You better say your prayers!”
“Worry for your friends instead
They should’ve took the stairs . . .”
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October 8th, 2010 by Wordsman
“AVALANCHE?” the young Prez asked
“You’ve tangled with the Turks
And here I was just thinking
You were all disgruntled clerks
“Sorry for the rudeness
You all know I’m new at this
I see now you’re not a group
That I can just dismiss”
Cloud, who was still half-asleep
Thought he had heard enough
Plus he saw the perfect chance
To show that he was tough
“Aeris! Tifa! Other two!
You all get out of here!
I’ll fight this guy alone
For reasons not completely clear!”
A hand dragged Tifa back inside
“We’re going now? That’s it?”
“My quarrel was with his dad
I’ll let him live . . . a bit”
Rufus said, “Fight me alone?
In that there is no shame
I think it’s cute that you assume
That I would do the same”
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October 1st, 2010 by Wordsman
Just then, a chopper did touch down
And startled ev’ryone
“Must be Rufus,” Barret said
“Who’s he?” “The Pres’dent’s son”
The quintet stepped outside
Into the city’s foul haze
A man with bright blond hair stood there
“What’s this? Five runaways?
“Spare me the introductions
I don’t want to know your name
I don’t care about your quest
Or how this far you came
“You see, I’ve got a brand-new job
And a lot on my plate
So, unless you’re Sephiroth
I’m ‘fraid you’ll have to wait”
Barret roared, “We’re AVALANCHE!
Won’t wait ‘round to be paged!”
The mention of a “plate” made him
Particul’rly enraged
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September 24th, 2010 by Wordsman
Shortly after, Cloud was woke
By a terrific THUD
Found his cell door open, and . . .
“Wow. That’s a lot of blood
“Hey, wake up!” “Huh? What? We’re free?”
“Hmm . . . who would let us out?”
“Whoa, that’s strange. JENOVA’s gone.”
“Don’t know what that’s about”
Up and up the blood trail wound
Until the very top
There they saw a grisly scene
That caused them all to stop
At his desk, the Shinra Prez
His face looked almost bored
There, protruding from his back
Was a five-foot-long sword
“This was the work of Sephiroth!”
Cloud’s shock could not be greater
“Sephiroth?” the others asked
Said Cloud, “Uh, tell ya later”
Cowering behind the desk
Was a short, porcine man
“Yep, he’s right!” Palmer declared
Before he up and ran
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