December 11th, 2009 by Wordsman
“Whoa, calm down!” the redhead said
“Man, don’t get so upset
Let’s just not do anything
That we’d later regret
“We just came here for the girl
We’ve got no beef with you
If you sheathe that sword, I swear
Our business will be through”
Cloud was not convinced. “Stay back
Unless you want to die
Why should I trust a word you say?
You filthy Shinra spy!”
“Hey Reno, guess he called your bluff!”
One mirthful soldier cried
Then, by ‘lectric cattle prod
He very promptly died
“We can do this the hard way, too”
Said Reno, eyes a-spark
“But it’s a shame. I oft prefer
To not be quite so dark”
Aeris shrieked. “Don’t fight in here!
The flowers will get wrecked!”
Then she dragged Cloud out the back
Before he could object
Reno followed, through the bed
“Get those two in a cell!
And if you step on one flower
You will catch holy hell”
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December 4th, 2009 by Wordsman
“Say Cloud,” the girl said suddenly
“Of all trades you are jack
Would you be int’rested in work
To help me watch my back?”
“Sure,” said Cloud, “but tell me:
What do you need guarding for?”
Aeris shrugged. “Just ask those guys
Approaching the church door”
Just then the girl was proven right:
In came four ugly mugs
One redhead in a sharp blue suit
Three faceless Shinra thugs
“’Kay,” said Cloud. “I’ll take the job
But for free I don’t work”
The voice inside his head told him
The redhead was a Turk
“Hmm,” said Aeris, thoughtfully
“What do I have? Let’s see . . .
I know! If you take me home
You get a date with me!”
He could not ask for more than that
‘Twas better than a kiss
Cloud drew his sword, approached the men
“Right! Who wants some o’ this?”
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November 27th, 2009 by Wordsman
Now ‘twas time to put on moves
Some feelings to invent
Then: “Do you have Materia?”
The girl on tangent went
“Uh, sure,” said Cloud, a-wond’ring
How to turn this to a line
“There are not many men around
With Materia like mine”
“Really?” asked the wide-eyed girl
“I’d heard it’s everywhere”
“N-no,” Cloud stammered
“No, you see . . . it’s really very rare”
“I have one too.” The girl giggled
Whipped it out to compare
“I got it from my mother
It’s the rarest of the rare!”
“What makes it so special?”
Cloud stared at the small green ball
Aeris could not stop laughing
“It does nothing at all!”
“That can’t be right,” argued Cloud
“You must have used it wrong
Listen to my tutorial
It shouldn’t take that long . . .”
Aeris shook her head. “No, no
It doesn’t work like yours
You don’t put it in your weapons
You can’t find it in stores”
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November 20th, 2009 by Wordsman
She returned to tending buds
Cloud his two choices weighed
Reunite with AVALANCHE
Or woo the fair young maid?
Cloud decided to stick ‘round
Could not resist that face
Besides, he was not sure he knew
The way to Tifa’s place
“You like flowers?” ask’ed Cloud
“Cuz I’ve got one right here . . .”
Then with a jolt he remembered
He’d made it disappear
“You bought it from me yesterday!”
The naïve girl declared
“We met when that reactor blew
I think that you were scared
“My name’s Aeris,” the girl said
“In case you don’t recall”
Cloud did not; in fact
She had not mentioned it at all
But Cloud recovered quickly
“How could I forget that name?
And I am Cloud, jack-of-all-trades!”
He nobly did proclaim
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November 13th, 2009 by Wordsman
Eyes now ope, Cloud looked around
But not too fast (he’d hurl)
He saw pews (boring), flowers (meh)
And . . . whoa, a pretty girl
“Are you alright?” the girl asked him
“You fell down from the sky
I wonder how it happened
Did you think that you could fly?
“You’re so lucky,” she explained
“The flow’r bed broke your fall”
Cloud, in pain, was not sure that
It really helped at all
“Sorry ‘bout the flowers
On them I’d not want to tread”
Then, since he could not help himself:
“So . . . seems I’m in your bed”
“Oh, they’ll grow back,” she told him
Failed to pick up on the line
This was one time that Cloud would need
A much more overt sign
“Flowers don’t grow in Midgar
At least, that’s what they say
But the sacred garden here
Makes bouquet on bouquet”
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November 6th, 2009 by Wordsman
Canto the Third: Cloud Wears a Dress, Sector Seven Feels the Press
Darkness was all that Cloud saw
And all he felt was dirt
Voices were all that he heard
And all he knew was hurt
“Now that was an impressive fall”
A mystery voice said
“You can forget about skinned knees
You really should be dead
“I mean, not even Greg Louganis
Could survive that dive”
“Wait,” said Cloud. “You’re telling me
I’m actu’lly alive?”
“’Course you are,” the voice replied
“You are the man: Cloud Strife!
In case you hadn’t noticed
We lead a very charmed life
“And now I think—slowly, gently—
You should get on your feet
The Shinra need stopping, but first
There’s someone you should meet”
“Hang on! Don’t go! Who are you? Please!”
Inside his head Cloud cried
“Don’t worry ‘bout me,” said the voice
“You’re the one who almost died”
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October 30th, 2009 by Wordsman
The threat removed, they prepared
To return to their abode
Sadly, they forgot one thing
Robots like to explode
The blast took out the walkway
Like an angry giant’s sledge
Cloud found himself clinging
To a crackling, creaking ledge
“Bomb’s still ticking,” Barret said
“We’ve really got to go”
“How could you?” Tifa yelled at him
“Leaving without Cloud? No!”
“Just go,” said Cloud, “‘fore Barret
Has himself some huge conniption
And, for the record, this right here?
Not in the job description”
Tifa cried, “You’d better live!
You I would truly miss”
Cloud was thinking: “If I do
You owe me big for this”
And then Cloud could hold on no more
He yelled this as he fell
“If this is how my story ends
I’ll see you all in Hell!”
End Canto the Second
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October 23rd, 2009 by Wordsman
The big robot closed in on them
The humming’s pitch grew high
“Hey, former SOLDIER!” Barret yelled
“How do we beat this guy?”
“How should I know?” Cloud replied
Attempting to stay cool
“I must have slept right through that class
Back there in SOLDIER school
“Your guess is as good as mine”
To which Barret said, “Shit
I’ll do what I always do
I’m gonna shoot at it”
“Wait,” said Tifa. “Here’s one thing
That in my school I learned:
Your attacks will hurt much more
When its big back is turned”
Cloud got in behind it
And the Airbuster was trapped
To this formation it soon proved
Unable to adapt
Spin one way, get struck by sword
The other: fist, foot, gun
Toss in a few lightning bolts
And that robot was done
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October 16th, 2009 by Wordsman
Cloud did not want to explode
And end up as debris
“I used to be in SOLDIER
Surely you remember me”
The Prez just laughed at poor Cloud’s plea
“You really must be kidding
You expect me to keep track
Of all who do my bidding?
“And now I must be leaving you
I’ve no more time to spend
A world to rule, a son to raise
A dinner to attend
“Before I go, just one last thing
In case you’d thought to run
I brought a little friend for you
You four enjoy your fun”
Cloud ran toward the chopper
Barret swore. Tifa looked glum
It wasn’t until later
That they heard the om’nous hum
A large robotic soldier
Came in from the walkway’s side
“I call it the Airbuster!”
From the chopper the Prez cried
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October 9th, 2009 by Wordsman
“Fight you?” the old fat man laughed
“Of that I’ve no intent
As for the introduction
Hi, I’m Shinra’s President
“I’m not much of a fighter
And I can’t ruin this suit
This is the joy of management
I just have to say, ‘Shoot’
“But I don’t mean to shoot you
Even vicariously
I’d hate for any of your blood
To get all over me
“Nor will I disarm your bomb
Of that please have no fear
The bomb will go off just as planned
But . . . you’ll all still be here”
“Wait a sec, now!” Tifa cried
“Can you be serious?
You’d let a whole reactor blow
Just to take care of us?”
The Pres’dent shrugged. “It’s no big deal
I’ve got six more of these
I missed yesterday’s fireworks
I’m watching the reprise”
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